Relationship Exercises Can Help

If your happily-ever-after is not the fairyland you thought it would be you may need help with improving your marriage. We hear a lot of stories from couples who have a marriage that is falling apart or on the brink of divorce. These couples are relationship exercises can helpin urgent need of answers to revive their relationship. This led us to make a list of relationship exercises for couples that will bring life back to your union.

Three Relationship Exercises for Your Marriage

1. Listening to Understand

Active listening is an essential communication exercise to do with your partner. This will help you and your teammate become better listeners, make it easier to talk about sensitive issues and you’ll have a deeper understanding of your spouse. You allow the speaker to talk without getting defensive. Periodically repeat what you understand and ask, “Did I get that right?” If the answer is yes, ask, “Is there more.” If it is no, have the speaker repeat what you missed. Continue with this process until the speaker feels totally understood and has nothing more to say on the issue. Remember the job of the listener is to ensure the speaker feels totally understood. You do not have to agree with what is being said, just convey that you understand it.

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2. Using the “I” Statement

When communicating with your partner, using the “I” statement is a great way to express your needs/wants or discuss sensitive issues. By making your conversations about how you feel instead of pointing at your teammate, you take defenses down and your spouse will be more willing to listen. It is a good idea to prepare them for the I statement, because it is often a topic that may be hard to hear. Simply ask your teammate to actively listen to what you have to share.

For example, “I have something that is bothering me and I would like to share it, if this is a good time for you to hear it.”  “I get so frustrated when I see dirty clothes all over the floor instead of in the hamper, because I know they won’t get picked up unless I do it and I’m tired too after a long day.”

This keeps the discussion about how you feel instead of blaming your partner. Now you partner knows who left the clothes on the floor, but by sharing your feelings and not blaming them, it makes it easier for them to “hear” what you are saying and potentially be more willing to do something about it.

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3. Affirming One Another

A lot of couples complain that their partner doesn’t show appreciation to them causing challenges in their relationships. A great way to resolve this is to spend time with your teammate writing a list of all the things that you both affirm or admire about each other and appreciate. This relationship exercise will make your spouse feel more secure, valued and confident in your marriage. A good affirmation is something declared to be true; a positive statement or judgment and 1) identifies a specific attribute or behavior;  2) includes a specific example of how the attribute is exhibited; and 3) includes the positive impact of the attribute or behavior.

Examples include:
• I appreciate your organization. The way you pay our bills on time strengthens our relationship because I know I don’t have to worry and I feel secure.
• I like it when you speak out and voice your opinions and feelings as soon as you notice a problem between us. I feel better when I don’t have to guess what you are thinking or feeling.
• I admire your out-going personality; that was one of the things I liked about you when I first met you. I feel loved when you take my needs into account and are willing to leave a party because I am tired.

Now go ahead and create your own. You don’t have to share them all at once. Spread them out to maximize their impact.


relationship exercises

Happy couple after marriage coaching. (courtesy of freeimagery at freedigitalphoto.net)

These are just a few of many couple relationship exercises that will help put your marriage back on the right path. Staying focused and repeating the activities mentioned above will help you have the connection you always desired with your spouse. If you find it difficult to implement them, consider a marriage coach who can facilitate application of improved relationship skills.

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Have you checked to see if you are a good candidate for marriage coaching? Why go through rough relationship challenges alone when we are here to help you attain the marriage you always wanted. Don’t wait until it’s too late, for more information, contact us now.

Do you need help with determining the difference between Marriage Coaching and Marriage Counseling? Explore our prior post;
What Is Better: Marriage Coaching or Marriage Counseling?